When Life Gives You Lemons…

TheBookishWriterKiwi came up with the MBTI to “when life gives you lemons…” for every personality.

ISFP: When life gives you lemons, grab them and eat them as fast as you can before life decides to take them back.
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ESFP: When life gives you lemons, ask for salt and tequila and throw a party!

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ISTP: When life gives you lemons you squirt them into the eyes of your enemies.

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ESTP: When I life gives you lemons, put them on your nipples and make lemon juice.

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INTP: When life, gives you lemons, you must clone those lemons and make super lemons then you create a new lemon race. adventure time animated GIF

ENTP: When life gives you lemons, construct a crude electrochemical battery. Then ??? Then profit.

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INTJ:  If life gives you lemons, deal with it.

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ENTJ: If life gives you lemons, throw them at life…see if life will make the same mistake again. Nothing messes with you.

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INFP:  When life gives you lemons you use your magical powers and spells to make it into an orange juice. Or you just write about the lemons.

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ENFP: When life gives you lemons, make orange juice and leave the world wondering how you did it. (Because ENFPs don’t read the directions)

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INFJ: When life give you lemons, eat them, they are good for you – life knows best.

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ENFJ: When life gives you lemons, store them in your fridge until you have guests over.

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ISFJ: When life gives you lemons, keep calm and make lemonade.

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ESFJ: When life gives you lemons make a cookbook out of it and become the next Martha Stewart.

ISTJ: When life gives you lemons make lemonade.chelsea handler animated GIF

ESTJ: When life gives you lemons, wipe out every lemon farm, and sell the last 2 lemons for profit.

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Best Always,

CEO

26 Lessons the Kardashians Taught Us About Staying Positive

I have two thoughts on positivity.

  1. It’s really important to be positive through all of life’s situations.
  2. #1 is really easier said than done and being positive is out of many people’s control.

The Kardashians are everywhere you turn your head. Although drama and controversy always follow the infamous family, one can’t deny they know how to spin the most terrifying situations in life, into something positive ($ and lucrative $).

They are here today to put a positive spin on your life. Here are some uplifting tips for whenever you are feeling down.

1) Appreciate the little things.

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2) Be fully proud of who you are no matter what.

3) Channel your creativity.

 

4) Always make the time to dazzle.

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5) Expand your vocabulary.

A new book or an online magazine should do the trick.

6) Practice the art of being friendly.

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7) Generosity is key.

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::share that célfie::

8) Be honest, to yourself and others.

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9) Never let the haters get you down.

10) Know how to take a joke.life animated GIF

11) Laughing does the heart good.

12) Remember life is a on-going learning process.kim kardashian animated GIF

13) And it doesn’t go as planned most of the time.

#suckitup

14) Stray away from the drama as much as humanly possible.

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15) Originality is beautiful.

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16) Have a cupcake.

There’s just something about portion controlled frosting when you’re down.

17) Spend quality time with loved ones.

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18) Make time to relax.

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19) Shine bright and don’t be sorry.

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20) Teach yourself something new.keeping up with the kardashians animated GIF

21) Do some hardcore self-evaluation.

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22) Vulnerability is okay.

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Crying is farthest sign of weakness, especially as an adult. Sometimes it takes more courage to be honest with yourself and your emotions and let it out.

23) Wholeheartedly follow your passions.

24) It’s perfectly fine to want me-time


25) Stay young-at-heart.

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26) Zany is completely fine once in a while.

Let it go and have a good time! Life is too short to not do so ❤

Best Always,

CEO

Confessions of a Witty Waitress Part II

You all know.. I wasn’t done…

giphy (39)and I’ll probably never be done as long as I’m in the service industry. Here are some more love/hate aspects of the very unpredictable life of a waitress.

LOVE: MOLDING MY PEOPLE SKILLS

One meets every kind of person working in the service industry; one sees the good,

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the bad,

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LOVE: 50% OFF FOOD/FREE FOOD

Nothing like spending less/no money on food.

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HATE: THE BIG BILLS

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Pay your bill that’s $27.53 with a $100 bill and we’re gonna have a problem.. in my head. 

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LOVE: FOOD MISPRONUNCIATION

Herb, salmon, andouille sauce… keep it coming guys it’s a little giggle.. in my head… every time.

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HATE: BEER LISTS/WINE LIST/ ALCOHOL LISTS

Alcohol makes a bill/check go from 0-100 really quick, BUT… I have had countless moments when a drink is on the menu and the bar is out of stock (ALWAYS ASK THE MANAGER/ BARTENDER) #makethatadouble

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HATE: DECLINED CARDS

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It’s just super awkward and I’m the queen of making awkward situations… more awkward.

HATE: COUPONS

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(I honestly don’t mind coupons) If you’re using one.. tip out the original bill. #TimesAreHard

LOVE: MEETING BOMB/AWESOME/HAPPY PEOPLE

When I crack a witty joke and you laugh, you’re awesome. Even if you’re upset, I’ll still TRY (my hardest) to find a way to make you crack a smile. Politeness and just plain smiling go a really long way with me. I will make sure your experience at the restaurant is exceptional. We work together to make the goal (feeding you) not just possible, but a very pleasant event.

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Best always,

CEO

P.S. I do not intend to anger or upset anyone with my posts about waitressing. I honestly enjoy what I do, so I really should not be complaining. However, humans need to vent and why notttttt on my blog. Please do not take any offense/ I hope I made you smile!

Video

#Harristocracy

Introducing the Buddha of Monmouth University, Professor Mary Harris. I was raiding YouTube and I found her channel! This video made me feel like I was sitting in her class listening to her give her excellent life advice. Professor Harris has a lifestyle channel called Sprout & Blossom to accompany her blog/website Sprout and Blossom Wellness. Subscribe/follow her for overall happiness in your life. #Harristocracy

I Forgot My Phone

Survived a week without it… in a world without media you begin to #live

Samandro

I have never felt overly attached to whatever hunk of plastic that is my current cellphone however, whenever I forget my phone at home, I begin to feel twinges of anxiety. What if I get a flat tire? What if there is an emergency? What if Cara breaks up with her boyfriend and, I miss her text message? What if Bobby says hi and, he thinks I am blowing him off because I didn’t answer?

It is without my phone beside me that, I realize how much I unconsciously reach for it. I don’t really use my phone much except for email and texts but when I don’t have my phone with me, I realize the ridiculous amount of times per day that I click the unlock button just to check whether something needs to be responded to.

Five minutes. Click. Twenty minutes. Click. Five minutes. Click.

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It’s like clicking…

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